I settled into the chair and the hairdresser went to work. She was a quiet one. I thought about striking up conversation, decided against it. I didn’t want to talk, and if she didn’t either, why force it just because I felt social pressure? I listened to other conversations instead, while pretending to watch the TV next to the mirror.
“–her boyfriend’s cousin is Aymish.”
“Is it Aymish? Or Ahmish?”
“Eh, tomayto tomahto.”
That was on the right. On the left, a girl was hovering over her boyfriend, who was in the chair next to me. His hairdresser didn’t look impressed.
“Is it okay if I stand here?”
“He’s got kind of a thing over here. Can you shave it off? Thanks.”
I wondered what the “thing” was. A hairy mole?
On my right, the older gentleman getting trimmed:
“Got any tie and knife clubs here?”
I thought he said “Italian nightclubs.”
“Sorry?” said his hairdresser.
“Any tie and knife clubs here?”
“Uh, I don’t know.”
“You know what a tie and knife club is, dontcha?”
The hairdresser said nothing. I imagine she made a “got me” face in the mirror, but I was looking at the Chopped episode on TV. I never bothered changing from whatever channel they started on, even though I was always handed the remote.
“It’s where you need a tie to get in and a knife to get out!”
On my right, the girlfriend was going on to the hairdresser:
“I wanted to lose twenty pounds and I told my boyfriend. Ex boyfriend. He said I tell you what, you lose twenty pounds by our birthday (because we had the same birthday) or we’re done.”
I glanced over to the mirror next to me. The hairdresser was frowning, in a curious sort of way.
“I ended up losing fifty,” said the girlfriend. Her reflection shrugged. “He dumped me anyway.”
Then my hairdresser started on my beard with the clippers and the world was lost in a buzz.
Day 248’s three random prompt categories were, “Shave and a haircut” (again), “Reflection,” and “All dialog.”
Most of these conversations are things I’ve really heard on the barber chair.